What NOT to Do When a Friend is Experiencing an Unexpected Pregnancy

close up of a woman's hands holding a smart phone and texting

“Help! My friend thinks she’s pregnant.”

It’s a common message or call around here. We get that you can feel just as lost if someone you know is facing an unplanned pregnancy. You want to do and say the right thing, but it’s sometimes hard to know what that is. So before anyone starts panicking, let’s start with what not to do. 😉

Don’t Panic

Saw that one coming, didn’t you?

She needs you to be calm because that may be the last thing she’s feeling. If a healthcare provider has not confirmed her pregnancy (a diagnostic ultrasound is the only 100% proven way to confirm), don’t start making plans just yet.

She may be thinking about the worst-case scenario, and the best thing you can do is help her take one step at a time.

Don’t Assume

Since you’ve already done an awesome job helping her stay calm, the next best thing is to help her get all the answers she needs. Let her know where she can make an appointment to confirm (or negate) her pregnancy, learn about all her options, and learn medical information about her pregnancy so she can make a fully informed choice.

It’s easy to assume what we’d do when faced with an unexpected pregnancy, but you never really know how you’ll feel until it happens.

If she already thinks she wants an abortion, verifying how far the pregnancy has progressed is the most important first step.

Don’t Rush

Once she’s learned everything she needs to know (and we hope you went with her for moral support), remind her she has time. Time to make a decision, time to pick a provider, time to think about her future. Time is almost always on her side. Rushing decisions, no matter what they are, can lead to regret.

Don’t Agree

This one may sound odd, but if she is focusing on the hard stuff or saying what she can’t do, listen to her concerns but lovingly share how capable and strong she is. Tell her she is tough enough, brave enough, and amazing enough to handle whatever comes her way. Remind her that she isn’t alone.

Have a friend right now going through an unexpected pregnancy? Shoot us a message! We’re happy to help answer any questions you or your friend may have.

How We Can Help

We provide private and professional services to anyone who thinks they may be pregnant – completely free of charge to you. Best of all, we’re a safe place to sit back, talk about your options, and be reminded of just how capable you are.

Contact Crossroads Pregnancy Clinic to learn more about the services we offer!